Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I checked into jail on foursquare
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
