ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
