youre lurking in front of me
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
