I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
