Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
You ate ashes out of my bong
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
