i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
