Will you blow on my dice?
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
