Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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