I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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