I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
