just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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