Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
