then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
