Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
