my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize
