Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
