Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
