I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
