Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
It's like God shit irony all over that family
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
