That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
how drunk are you?
Several
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize