hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
