with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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