I just pynch a tree in the face
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
