quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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