i don't like sucking hair
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
