Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
