it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
should my penis look like a turkey
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
