Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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