I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Randomize
