Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
