hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
