honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
wakey wakey hands off snakey
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
