My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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