I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize