I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
