I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
