There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
