Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
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