C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
