did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
