I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
