Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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