also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
We left an ass print on the piano.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
