Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
