I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
