just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
