no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
