The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
