Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
My room smells like vodka and shame
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize