This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
